10 Aug 2011

The Test, A Newspaper and My Alarm


09 August 2011
2.40 p.m
Final Year, Mass Communication classroom

Supru, our class advisor, tells us to ‘put our books away and take a sheet of paper to write the test’ (yes, our college is lame beyond repair that way). And yours truly is sitting in the last but one bench and chiding herself for not having read the newspaper (it’s a current affairs test). She looks around to see half the class scribbling the answers down furiously while the other half (which includes herself and her best friends & family) look at each other and grin that special grin which is used to denote that *I’m-scoring-single-digits-on- this-one*.

Since I’m usually one of the furious scribblers and the one whose answer sheet gets passed around, this throw me a little bit. So, I make a resolution.


I will wake up at 6.45 am tomorrow, get dressed soon and read the newspaper. How difficult can waking up half an hour earlier be? And I can get so much work done as well.

10.00 p.m
Hostel room

I stop reading all the blogs open in 25 tabs on my browser, stop refreshing my dashboard every three seconds to see if I have any new comments and wind up my FB business for the night. I feel a small pang as I disconnect the net - ‘maybe someone’s sent me a mail, maybe a new follower, maybe a new private message’.. I shake myself out of the creeping obsession and firmly shutdown the laptop; I’m not even going to watch Grey’s Anatomy tonight à efforts to sleep early, in order to rise early. I have had it uptill here *points* of birds getting worms and all.

Anyway, I’ll just head over to the other room to see what’s going on and say the customary good night’s.
(Note: The ‘other room’ is where the crazies live.)

10 August 2011
1.00 a.m
‘Other room’

I am dancing, steps which are too weird to even describe (one would be the chicken-dance of Chandler fame), with a party hat on my head, a ‘cape’ (bed-sheet) around my neck, a party popper in my hand (blowing in full volume), camera in the other, music playing as high as humanly spunk allows me to and surrounded by seven girls giggling madly and without reason and getting high on coffee and sherbet. 

Yes. Plain coffee. And sherbet made of water and concentrate.
Don’t ask.

6.45 a.m
Own Bed




The Evil Alarm

Eduardo (from The Social Network) is down on a knee with a big, fat diamond and an adoring expression....
The alarm goes ‘Daddy mujhse bola..’ (yes, that IS my alarm tone, helps me get a kick start *stares defensively*)



One eye opens reluctantly. The other refuses to co-operate/coordinate. I take a sneaky peek at the bed below mine; Indu’s already up, the big, fat goat. Makes me feel guilty.

I groan.
Ok. Five more minutes won’t make a difference. Alarm set for 6.50.

6.50 a.m
Own Bed

Waking up when the needles are not in alignment is bad luck.  And also, by 7.00 the bathrooms will be free. And reading the paper takes what, like, ten minutes?

7.00 a.m
Own Bed

Already?! The clock is wrong. It has been fixed. Somebody has paid it money to torture me out of bed. It’s a conspiracy!!

And hence, I refuse to abide the time that it shows. Hmph.

7.15 a.m
Own Bed

One eye opens again and checks out the other top bunk and finds a similar eye (the other roomie) checking it out. They reach a mutual understanding and go back to sleep. If they are late, they’ll be late together. And that, we can deal with.

7.30 a.m
*snooze*

7.45 a.m
*snoooooze*

8.00 a.m
*snoooooooooooooooze*

8.15 a.m
OHMYFUCKINGGODDAMSHITTYCRAPPAZOID, I’m so late.














8.30 a.m

Dressed. Out-of-breath. Running.
Missing ear-rings. Forgot to take wallet. And ID card. Forgot room key. Forgot breakfast. Forgot pen.

Forgot to take newspaper from Warden’s office.

8.45 a.m
Final Year, Mass Communication classroom

“Ma’am, hostelites. Water main broke in the hostel, we had to wait for soooo long to take a bath. Such bad services for the good money we pay, tch, tch….”
Attendance gained.

10 August 2011
2.40 p.m
Final Year, Mass Communication classroom

That special grin which is used to denote that *I’m-scoring-single-digits-on- this-one *. So I make a resolution.

I will wake up at 6.45 am tomorrow, get dressed soon and read the newspaper. After all how difficult is it waking up half an hour earlier than my usual time. And I can get so much work done with the extra time I’ll gain.

And here we go again….

Previously titled "The Alarm That Was 'Fixed' By The Ones On The Dark Side"

52 comments:

  1. enjoyed reading it :)

    i guess most of us could correlate to it :)

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  2. you are so lovely :) you remind me of my college days <3 i used to wake up really early, around 6:30ish even if i had slept at 2am :D and still i never studied :D hahaha....love & hugs <3

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  3. @ alchemist, thanks:) I know, waking up early is a real pain.

    @ Chintan, gracias madame:)
    Oh my MY, you HAVE to tell me how to do that! :D I desperately need a few non-late days...

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  4. kept me glued till the end...like a suspense thriller :) waking up early is the most difficult thing especially in hostels..and everyday one vows to get up early in the morning and the next morning the same snooze stuff :)

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  5. LOL! Reminds me of me in Journalism school. :P but I had a bad shaking when I did really bad on a test that mattered to me. :P Had a rude shock that woke me up :P Trust me :P It was not pretty :P a lone C minus on my graduation certificate is still embarassing. :P

    But it is part of college and hostel life to do this. :P
    Lovely post. Made me miss my college and room mates :) :*

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  6. like the narration
    nice story

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  7. happy college days .. but still you wake up too early.. I don't use any alarms..my warden does that for me :P

    Weakest LINK

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  8. The good thing about ur post is that it brought back memories of me doing the exact same thing

    The bad thing about ur post is that it's bringing back memories that nothing has changed...:)

    Superbly funny post, P.. very well written :)

    Lovely read :)

    Lovely one, P!!!

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  9. Waking up early has never been one of my strong points. Its a struggle. It takes all my will power. And finally i manage to wake up on time (cant help it when you have a job). And snooze is the best thing that ever happened to me. Enough said.

    It easier if u r staying alone.. But with roomies and (Crazy) friends??? Impossible!

    Great post! :)

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  10. so enjoyed this post and so glad you found me as so enjoy to come here!
    I have to get up at 5:30 am so it's bedtime for me!
    Be well, be happy!

    Margie :)

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  11. Ooh i so relate to this one.
    I did it even today. Thought to wake up at 5:30....but slept till 7. Nice!

    A college students life!

    Awesome read!

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  12. @ Muhammad Israr, :D suspense thriller? Thanks

    @ Srinidhi, OMG, hopefully I'll pull myself together before that:D Thanks.

    @ sm, gracias.

    @ Rachit, :D I wish mine did too:P But she hates all of us already, I wouldn't push my luck and tempt her to kill me.

    @ R-A-J, :D I'm sure not having to have 80% attendance makes it easier... Thanks Milord.

    @ Chandana, exactly my point! xD Thanks.

    @ Margie, the feeling is mutual Madame:) Gunnyt:) And thanks.

    @ Red Handed, true that:D

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  13. Ha.. Like RAJ said, nothing has changed for me even now. Every night, i go to bed with the resolve that I will wake up half an hour earlier, make lunch and pack dabba, and take a bus instead of auto to office. Every morning I wake up and think "Fuck it. I'll have lunch in cafeteria, and I'll take a bus tomorrow on wards." Never happenes. Tomorrow really never comes.

    And it did bring back memories of how we used to wake up at 8:45 for a 9 AM class and then ride our cycles at high speed to class. :D The good thing about staying on campus is that you tend to stop bothering about how you're dressed and whether you've combed your hair or not. The classroom is like just another room in your compound. :)

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  14. Aahhh.. This is sooo my story!!..

    Spaceman Spiff and I would eye at each other everytime the alarm snoozes and then decide to shut our eyes for another 5 minutes.
    :)

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  15. ha ha... Sooper.. :) Enjoyed reading it.. :) Like everyone else said, reading this brings back those good old college days, hostel life memories... I think majority of them belong to this category and I am no exception.. :)

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  16. Hahahah. Seriously, the way you write, the story kept me glued till then end. This is what happens every time i make a plan for the upcoming week just before my quizzes, and the plan is what never happens. :P

    An Awesome post, like always! :D

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  17. LOL. EPIC ! It is almost as if we live the same bloody life. Including the alarm tone.


    *I’m-scoring-single-digits-on-this-one*. Won me over!

    Regards,
    R.R

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  18. Although I too came across such situation, I never really bothered about them. The attendance was taken care by frnds(ders something called Proxy u know..;p) and 85% attendance was only for namesake. And I'm lucky that my office doesn't have a fixed timing..;-)

    As for few ideas to wake up early that I used to follow in my school days.
    1. Set ur alarm 1hr in advance than the time u wanna wake-up. For ex: If u want to wake-up at 6.30 set the alarm for 5.30
    2. Buy an alarm which can wake up ur entire hostel, and keep it out of ur reach. So that u have to get off your bed to mute it.
    3. Do not piss before u go to bed and drink lots of water before sleeping. It will wake u up as early u want...:-)

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  19. @The Meditating Lion: :D Remember how we used to literally fly on our cycles?! :)
    Some days we used to bunk just so that we could sleep longer. And then watch FRIENDS back-to-back. :)

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  20. What-A-Post!!!!!!! :D Everyday I set my alarm for 6:45 am, so that I can switch on the geyser and take bath by 7:15? But....every time...every effing day...that 5 minute Snooze makes me late by half an hour. I take shower at 7:45 which has a dominoes effect, my roomie gets up late, we eat late, rush to the road to catch an auto and pray feverishly that we get attendance. Loved it!!!!!! :D

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  21. LOL, It is a common story, only that the context is different in your case and mine.

    I so loved that snooze option. And 'Paapa' tum se roz roz jaagte hi bola? :O


    Cheers,
    Blasphemous Aesthete

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  22. Beautifully narrated...I could picture each scene so vividly; it's a gift you have there.

    "Waking up when the needles are not in alignment is bad luck." --- this really cracked me up :D :D

    Good read :)

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  23. hehe this happens with me many times! I usually set 3 alarms.. one goes off at 5.. then 5.30 and last one at 5.45 which i snooze till its 6.15!!! :D :D tricks the mind sometimes :)

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  24. Story of my life! I used to go to bed around 2 am and wake up at 7 am to catch my college bus that comes at 7.20!

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  25. LOL. Loved your post. Count me in as one of those thousands who was never ever able to wake up early and get things done - esply reading the newspaper.

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  26. @ Divya, :D never does, ever.
    Still, you need to think about the guys in class na... You don't want to scare the bejesus out of them:P

    @ The Meditating Lion, lol, happens to all of us eh?

    @ Sunil Padiyar, thanks:)

    @ KN., :D thanks man, thats the way we are destined to live;P

    @ Rohit, :D thanks.. and welcome to my space.

    @ Kanthu, proxy doesnt work for us, remember with the lame test and such? :P
    The first two won't work, already tried those:P But the third ROFL:D:D Epic idea, thanks:D
    And welcome.

    @ MSM, thanks:P So many of us with messed up lives.

    @ BA, what's your context?:) I meant the song.. From DB?

    @ Ashish Kalsi, thanks milord:) Actually that part is my OCD for real :P

    @ maithili, 3 alarms? Oh the God, I have enough trouble with ONE!! :D

    @ Zarine Mohideen, Ooooh, that's close:P I have a contender :D

    @ Janani Balasubramanyam, :D thanks.. aren't we all:)

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  27. The Eduardo thing was hilarious!
    Chandler's chicken dance....LOL!!! :D

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  28. Totally ENJOYED reading that. Lovely.
    And chandler's chicken dance. Yes, MAJOR LOVE. Your posts are damn good have I told ya? <3 Waking up early, is like a miracle.
    Love,
    Sonshu

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  29. 28+1 more herschey's from me...yours is crazier because ur in hostel...me being at home mainted a similar pattern...please read from one of my old blog, i dunno how to bring import it in my new blog so...the old link. Enjoy

    http://stainsbygirl.xanga.com/685955476/excerpts-from-my-diary---1/

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  30. Haha xD

    ‘maybe someone’s sent me a mail, maybe a new follower, maybe a new private message’..

    I DO THIS ALL THE TIME! =D

    And the alarm. Dehli Belli FTW!

    I loved reading this post.=D

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  31. This was fun!!! You have a lovely and interesting flair for writing with that subtle humor! I enjoyed reading this post! :)

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  32. And today's was probably the worst!!!

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  33. @ Uruj, I know, never fails to crack me up:P Good exercise as well xD

    @ Sonshu, thank you so very much:) now you did :D
    Miracle indeed:P

    @ HijiBijBij, I'm not sure I know either, but I think the import option might help?

    @ Hamza Bin Ladin, it's an OCD, ain't it:P
    Thank you:D

    @ :-Dee, thanks!! <3

    @ Deeps, it was -_- horrible.

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  34. Lol my buddy missed his end semester exam and got a backlog because he over slept :D :D Previously he was our college topper. He is doing his intern in facebook now though :P

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  35. ehehe!! :P :P
    Typical today's youth!
    This sooooo describes our life(style!) :P :P
    Looovvveeed the post!! :D :D

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  36. Good one :-D Remember the time when Bond used to wait for us outside the classroom and the crappy explanations we gave him for being late. How can I forget the 'Chicken dance' :-D Good to know that you're still at it.I've switched over to Joey's victory dance:)

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  37. @ Gaya, :D Chandler's suits me better:P Don't you think?

    @ Felicity, thanks!:)

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  38. OMGDIESLAUGHING!
    I'm ALWAYS late
    i identify with you :P

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  39. OMGDIESLAUGHING!
    I'm ALWAYS late
    i identify with you :P

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  40. @ Uruj, I know, never fails to crack me up:P Good exercise as well xD

    @ Sonshu, thank you so very much:) now you did :D
    Miracle indeed:P

    @ HijiBijBij, I'm not sure I know either, but I think the import option might help?

    @ Hamza Bin Ladin, it's an OCD, ain't it:P
    Thank you:D

    @ :-Dee, thanks!! <3

    @ Deeps, it was -_- horrible.

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  41. The Eduardo thing was hilarious!
    Chandler's chicken dance....LOL!!! :D

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  42. Story of my life! I used to go to bed around 2 am and wake up at 7 am to catch my college bus that comes at 7.20!

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  43. LOL, It is a common story, only that the context is different in your case and mine.

    I so loved that snooze option. And 'Paapa' tum se roz roz jaagte hi bola? :O


    Cheers,
    Blasphemous Aesthete

    ReplyDelete
  44. Although I too came across such situation, I never really bothered about them. The attendance was taken care by frnds(ders something called Proxy u know..;p) and 85% attendance was only for namesake. And I'm lucky that my office doesn't have a fixed timing..;-)

    As for few ideas to wake up early that I used to follow in my school days.
    1. Set ur alarm 1hr in advance than the time u wanna wake-up. For ex: If u want to wake-up at 6.30 set the alarm for 5.30
    2. Buy an alarm which can wake up ur entire hostel, and keep it out of ur reach. So that u have to get off your bed to mute it.
    3. Do not piss before u go to bed and drink lots of water before sleeping. It will wake u up as early u want...:-)

    ReplyDelete
  45. ha ha... Sooper.. :) Enjoyed reading it.. :) Like everyone else said, reading this brings back those good old college days, hostel life memories... I think majority of them belong to this category and I am no exception.. :)

    ReplyDelete
  46. @ Muhammad Israr, :D suspense thriller? Thanks

    @ Srinidhi, OMG, hopefully I'll pull myself together before that:D Thanks.

    @ sm, gracias.

    @ Rachit, :D I wish mine did too:P But she hates all of us already, I wouldn't push my luck and tempt her to kill me.

    @ R-A-J, :D I'm sure not having to have 80% attendance makes it easier... Thanks Milord.

    @ Chandana, exactly my point! xD Thanks.

    @ Margie, the feeling is mutual Madame:) Gunnyt:) And thanks.

    @ Red Handed, true that:D

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  47. happy college days .. but still you wake up too early.. I don't use any alarms..my warden does that for me :P

    Weakest LINK

    ReplyDelete
  48. kept me glued till the end...like a suspense thriller :) waking up early is the most difficult thing especially in hostels..and everyday one vows to get up early in the morning and the next morning the same snooze stuff :)

    ReplyDelete
  49. enjoyed reading it :)

    i guess most of us could correlate to it :)

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  50. Snooze button. Best invention in the world. Period.

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  51. CLASSIC... i must say.. i read this post twice and laughed both times like a mad man... i ll be reading it once again after am done posting this comment :)
    the alarm tone is same here.. yet instead of waking me up.. that becomes the background score when am running to my class.. late as usual.
    too good.. and god bless you.

    P.S : Am still laughing recollecting what was written as i type :)

    Cheers :)

    ReplyDelete

Go on, you can say it.