13 Feb 2012

The Road I Failed To Take

Haven't we all had people in our lives who leave behind a faint sense of dissatisfaction for not having truly spoken to them about everything that mattered? Haven't we all had at least one person in our lives who we don't even know properly but have always had the feeling that we would have been good friends, if either of you had only taken the pain to let go of the ego and extend that hand? That someone who has misunderstood you grossly and you have made the same mistake with equal vigor, parted with not so much as a passing glance and then had it come back and irk you in some small way?


(If you haven't, then GAH! to you)


This goes out to one person who I had a lot of faith in, the key word here being had.




I thought you were the sensible one, the one who has the sense to be objective. But more than that, I felt we were friends. Not the close kind of bffs, but the kinds who run into each other in Forum ten years from now and have coffee over how much life has changed. 


But I guess the feeling wasn't mutual. Ah well.


But the thing is, I am worried. Just a little bit though.
Worried that the same friends who you hold close to your heart and fight tooth and nail for are the same ones who never thought twice about calling you that without a moment's hesitation. That too, in front of me. The 'opposition'.
Their poison has already got to you. Don't let them catch you unawares though. 


You think you are always one step ahead? Little do you realise that I withdrew long back. I have been sitting on the sidewalk watching you trying to outsmart yourself... Trip all over your own two feet. 
I considered you a worthy adversary till you played dirty. You stooped down instead of rising up to challenge my very existence. I was just disappointed that you didn't. 


I still have a soft corner for you, somehow. In spite of the unnecessary dirty looks and the conspiracies. 
But you have lost my respect and regard. 
Not that it matters to either of us but still... Like Wordsworth, someday I shall sit on my couch in a pensive mood and contemplate, not daffodils, but a friendship that withered before it bloomed. 


This is mostly because you have helped me calculate my GPA every time. This is almost entirely because you taught me what a Chi Square is when I most needed it. 


Thank you.


P.S: A very happy valentine's day to all those who are hell-bent on celebrating it, but be safe and keep yourselves far away from any violently mental anti-love people. I ceased to believe in the 'magic of St. Valentine' a coupla years back, though. And yes, I don't like being predictable in case y'all were expecting full on mush post :P

53 comments:

  1. Replies
    1. :P Kuch ni, you know me, drama queen :P

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  2. People teach us stuff don't they. Some demonstrate how things are to be done while others show us what not to do.

    In the end, pick up what makes sense to you and get on with it because that's whats ultimately left to do.

    You have no idea how thankful I am for this Mush break of sorts if you can call it that :P.

    Cheers :)

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    1. Exactly... Nothing we say or do to make it better or worse will matter not now, not ten years from now either :)

      :D Couldn't put up a 'oh I'm so in love' post for V-Day could I? Too cliched :P

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  3. Oh yeah, I've had such relationships in my life, mainly one in particular, when I was about your age I think. Trust me, when you get as old as I am, things will matter less, time will make things look silly, and with a little bit of growing up and maturity, the same people will become your good friends. It will be easier to let go, to forgive, and also to forget. Today the same girl and I are friends, we acknowledge that our egos and other situations got in the way of what could have been, and now we are at peace with each other :)

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    1. Hmm... words of the wise, hopefully, the peace will find me too:)

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  4. We've all had that person who once was a good friend. But due to some very petty reasons, lost that person. Life teaches us so much. Our entire universe shifts in just THAT one second. I guess that's the beauty of life. It never fails to surprise you. When you least expect it it gives you the best and the worst of things.

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  5. If you've lived a regret free life you really haven't lived at all. We've all got someone we wish we didn't let go of, or wonder what could have happened.

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    1. Uncertainity. Maybe I could write a whole post on that alone :D

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  6. stupid guy if the person is a he.if not, well MEH! achha likha hai

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  7. A same road perhaps many roads i failed to take. Due to this still i am regretting and not able to do an eye contact with my parents. I know how much it matters. But now i have started neglecting emotions and just go on with it. N my GPA too may be screwd. :p

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    Replies
    1. Things will change and life will come a full circle but you will have to put one foot in front of the other and be ready to walk the distance.

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  8. Happy Blahlentine's Day to you. :/

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  9. *Hugs* Don't be sad,you ought to meet a couple of cracks to cherish your good friends.So don't worry and let's stay calm to plot revenge :D...(That was a little over the board.Sorry)

    I don't the get the hype about exchange of cards and gifts.Anyways for people who need a day to celebrate their love,happy valentines day.

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    1. Naaah, I'm good. The person concerned isn't all THAT important :D Thanks :*

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  10. Hmmm..things like this happened before :(
    take care PV

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    1. Myriad of emotions that all of us live through I suppose :)

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  11. Doesn't everyone have one such person in life? Yeah everyone does. It happens so. Maybe because so that we will know the value of those who think we are worthy.

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    1. Point. Makes us cherish the ones we have.

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  12. Hah! What eeeeez theeeeeeez, babe? Valentines' Day and a plain post? I was expecting soemthing very romantic;)

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    1. Gah :D I've become anti-valentine's day Madame ;P

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  13. Happy Valentine day to you too.
    Anti-love people.... lol :P

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  14. Some people just leave, leaving their trace behind :)
    We've all met people like this :)
    You wrote it well.
    Like Wordsworth, someday I shall sit on my couch in a pensive mood and contemplate, not daffodils, but a friendship that withered before it bloomed.
    Loved these lines :)

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    1. Thank you :) I wasn't sure too many people would get the reference:)

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  15. I'm totally anti valentine too :P

    And...yes...i totally relate with what you're saying because we all have those hard times in life when someone isnt who we thought they were anymore.

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    1. Hmmm... This was more about not taking the effort to get to know them sweetheart.

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  16. Sigh. That's the worry I carry around with myself all the time. Not a fun thing to live with.

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  17. I totally relate to what you said in 1st para.. you know mistakes happen.. misunderstanding ruins relationship.

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    1. Erm, this was more about NOT having a relationship with some one who you could have.

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  18. I am listening to Rihanna and the post goes aptly with the song....

    ~ We found love in a hopeless place ~

    I know, the post isn't *really* about love, but just saying, I kind of connected....

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    Replies
    1. Coincidence much? I was listening to it on loop for a whole day.

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  19. I totally relate to what you you hv written...this is life...Keep smiling :)

    I am hosting Boticca.com giveaway currently, where you can win $100 worth of jewelery and bags...Just click the link below...I'll wait for you there :)

    Enter Boticca.com giveaway and win $100
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    Replies
    1. Thanks for dropping by. And I already have entered the giveaway, only somewhere else. But thanks.

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  20. Oiii that pain's still there right?!?
    Umm some people are just hard to let go, despite all that they do to us.
    It's strange really.

    Anyway as a post, I love it. Because somewhere I know I feel the same.
    Happy Valentine's. And you've been awarded on my blog :)

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    1. Pain, yeah. But not much for we never even gave it a chance.
      Thanks love :)

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  21. hmmm.... very different kinda post, this. Well, just one, dark-chocloate-filled advice :-) .... Every individual who crossed your path, has left behind a mark - a scar, a dent, a fragrance, a splash of color .... and it is THESE marks that mold you into the wonderful person that you are! So, happy V-day, beautiful!

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    1. That is SO going to be my update. Can I? Can I? SO true and a beautiful way of putting it.

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  22. i dont like the thoughtful..kind of sad you. Cheer up!
    We all have someone in our life, whom we regret meeting and being close to but cant let go. Vulnerable us!

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  23. so true.. we all have someone whom we thought would have been good friends... hope u had a great valentine :D

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    1. :| I didn't actually, thanks for asking though :)

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  24. I'm glad you are an anti-Valentine person too. I wouldn't have pegged you for anything else!

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    1. :D I didn't know when I became one, for I was the opposite only a few years back.

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  25. I had one person from my college all the way through this post. So true.

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  26. jst fell out of one so called friendship...not even a month ago.she was whimsical-ish and i hold on to logics even when i'm whimsical.Friends aren't made just bcz they had two golgappas/movie/shopping/drinks together after office...they are made bcz they see you. Don't assume things abt you and dont keep telling you wht to do. maybe we wr just steel and wool bt things went very ugly. Regret. a lot of it.

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  27. ITs been 9 months since a dear friend walked out of my life. I have no clue when he will return. Heck I dont know if he will return. I had known him since class 4. It was sad and is sad to imagine this is life without him. I need to let go an move on no? I tell myself that.

    He took a road without me and I just have to make peace with that. But I find it hard everyday. Sorry for the outburst. But you made me nostalgic. :)

    Thanks for writing this. Its a depressing consolation, but I guess I am not alone. :)

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  28. Hey PeeVee.. Pretty much relate to ur words... Some ppl are difficult to understand! Sigh... And after a point even their weirdness starts overshadowin their goodness!

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Go on, you can say it.