28 Sep 2011

Of Us, Women

Not to be a big, fat joy-kill but I try to look at things from both POV's.
And since we have all turned into a feminist lot suddenly and the poor(?) men are left wondering what hit them, I thought I'd help them out a bit and list out how women can be major pains in the tushy.
Lets be fair for a minute, shall we?

(I'll list out only those things which I can vouch for in person and from people around for I have no right to generalize)
1) We are a manipulative lot.


While this is not a bad thing for we have our fathers wrapped around our little finger and we mean it with all the love in the world, there are women I know who are SO bloody good at mind-fucking men so bad that they are left wondering which way is up. Right from making decisions seem like the guy's idea in the first place to getting things done with tears and tantrums.

2) We over-analyse.
For decades, research has be shoved in our faces saying men are made differently from us. Why don't we just accept that? No. We have to take every single action, psycho-analyze it and make it out that they don't love us or respect us or some indepth feeling that he doesn't even know to name.

3) We are bitches. Sometimes.


We take him shopping when we KNOW he detests it AND make him carry our bags. We complain about the time he spends with his friends no matter how many sweet gestures he makes for us. We tell our bffs all about the relationship and rail at him when he mentions one teeny detail to his buddy. We whine and complain and nag and then wonder why he lost interest.

4) We are hypocrites.
We stare at good-looking guys, talk about their ass being sculpted, swoon all over them, indulge in locker-room talk with our girls, bat our lashes at random guys, enjoy the attention showered on a girls' night out (do not even begin denying any of this). Yet when we find one single text on his phone from his colleague (about WORK), we start having 'trust issues' and raise hell in his life and ours.
We willingly lose it to him and later complain he forced us.
We tell him that we love him just the way he is and ask him to change the way he behaves.
We dress up like sluts and blame him for staring. He's a guy, he's made that way, there's no way we can change than. So if we don't want him to stare the lets cover ourselves up and be modern in a decent way. THEN he stares, break his bones. I'll help.

5) We are irrational and we generalize too much.
Men don't understand PMS and yet the ones who love us try. Half a brownie point.


Lets not overdo it unless he behaves like a prick back to us.
Just because one guy is a blasted pervert doesn't mean all of them are. Maybe they are, but there are gentlemen who never make it known. There are. Still. Lets not lose faith in entire mankind.

Men will be men. It's up to us to make them meet us somewhere in the middle on common ground for love them or hate them, we can't live without them. Even Shahana says so in the end.


All this said, I also add that most men are jackasses who don't realize that without women their world would be full of dostana, beer and crude jokes.
No warm bodies to curl up with, no one to cook for, no one to assert your masculinity to, none to be macho for.
You exist because we do. You are happy because we make you happy.
Love us the way we love you.
Learn some respect, treat us the way you would your mother, your sister and your wife for we are all those to somebody.
Red says all this better than I do. Go read.

27 comments:

  1. I heart breakingly admit all of it is so true ;)
    We can be manipulative to its peak, bitches (sometimes). We can complain away to glory, we can cruelly emotionally blackmail with tears,
    yet we love. And we love with all our heart. Unconditionally. That, no one can deny :)

    ReplyDelete
  2. HAHAHA! I agree. :P Only, I don't shop :P So my man got lucky :P But I can spend hours in a bookstore :P Oopss :P

    Super post :D

    ReplyDelete
  3. I was really liking it, and then I read the last paragraph. It wasn't so bad, but it kind of went a bit against the message you were spreading. Still, both sexes have it bad, and its nice for a women to realise and accept this.

    ReplyDelete
  4. loved the 4 th and 2 nd ones....!!!!

    ReplyDelete
  5. Yeah right, and had there been no men, the world would have ended much much time before schedule. Why, if you may ask. Ladies might have died of jealousy of other women :P

    Kidding, the thing is that Men and women are like parallels, if we don't exist, whom would ladies dress for? And the same thing, whom would they cuddle into?


    Cheers,
    Blasphemous Aesthete

    ReplyDelete
  6. I really don't get this battle between the sexes. Both know that both have an equal number of jerks/bitches and some amazing genuine ppl.. still we lash out at each other! Its a never ending debate..!

    But point is I agree to every single thing you've written here just like how I agreed to everything that Red had written. And the fact remains that we can't live without each other.

    Except for #4 - we stare and appreciate and it makes men feel all macho and good. But their stares usually make us feel like pulling their eyeballs out! There are good stares and then there are bad stares! :P

    ReplyDelete
  7. I do treat her better than I treat anyone else in the worlddddd.
    I agree with you, waise.

    ReplyDelete
  8. I heart this, sistah!

    To add to it, I don't know which category they would fall into, though:-

    a) If they watch a match or the news on TV, we complain that they watch too much TV. But if our favourite programme is on, we'll bite if he so much as tries to kiss us.

    b) We get offended if he stares too hard at us or leches, but will feel insulted if he doesn't remember the dress that you wore last year for your it's-been-two-months-since-we-kissed-anniversary.

    c) We'll be all about 'treat us equally', but if they don't carry our bags or hold open the car door, we'll call him callous and insensitive.

    d) We may or may not cook. That's our wish. Plus, we're always tired because of working so hard, you know. But if he so much as mentions how wonderfully his mom cooks, we get upset that he doesn't like our cooking- the cooking that he hardly gets to savour.

    e) Men genuinely don't know what they have done wrong- well, most of them. They need to be told. And when they're told, most of them will understand and make amends. But no, do we let them? Our mantra is "if you don't know what you've done wrong, then I'm not gonna tell you."

    Gah. Women.

    As much as men need women, women too need men. heck, even the spelling is incomplete without them!

    (Have you read my post "I'm a girl"?)

    ReplyDelete
  9. Its so true! Men are wonderful and I love them the way they are :)

    ReplyDelete
  10. Hahahah. I think I would die if the world had no men! I mean, they are so much simpler and less messed up than women :)

    ReplyDelete
  11. Refreshing to see someone finally talk some sense. The last few lines balanced out the perspective.

    I seriously don't get what people achieve with gender bashing. There are differences between the Ying and the Yang but doesn't that make them unique entities in the first place.

    ReplyDelete
  12. most of the above :)
    loved reading it.he he he...we are bitch..:)hehehe
    hey blog is slow in opening ...doesnt move takes lot of time dear.may be bcos of lot os stuff...widgets.

    ReplyDelete
  13. I hate how hypocritical us women are!

    ReplyDelete
  14. Hahahaha. AWESOME. I loved the honesty there so much. You are too right about us, in fact that's just US. We love the way he is, (well we say it) but still we want to be the cause of the change in him, so we want to bring a change in him. I don't know, why the hell.
    And about bring possessive, God, i have seen girls like that. Even if any of my male friends who are really close to me, pretend to have another girl best friend, i start to show tantrums and halt the talk. See, it's not even love still jealousy is like our second resort already. :p
    We say, they should trust us, but we ourselves don't trust them enough (well, sometimes men are just not too trustworthy, when it comes to women you see :p)
    But all in all, i would agree to almost every word there. And we are the biggest manipulative out there! :D

    ReplyDelete
  15. woaaa...nice one...and yeah they are sweet bitter truths of the Les Femme world :P...Guess m posting for the first time..
    and I love the collection of pix right on top of ur blog...FRIENDS is somethinf we can never get tired of;)

    ReplyDelete
  16. Oooooooooooooooh Hhahahahah i the like i the like. I am a virgo and i OVER ANALYSE so much!!!
    But you know what you made me sad I came face to face with the fact that i am not womanly enough. :( I am not a manipulator. Whenever i fight with my guy and i know i has hundreds of points in my favour i forget the all the points and go all silent. Thus he wins the battle. when i have kept the phone down all the points flood back to my head and then it is too late to fight :(
    I also have never taking my guy for shopping apart from a shoe shopping. I do not like shopping with men because they are not patient enough, atleast my DAD and thats why i always go with my girlfriends or alone. So the making him carry bag also neevr happens :(
    Oh i am a bitch not sometimes but always! :p
    Lovely read!

    ReplyDelete
  17. @ Priyanka Kamath, :D It is, unfortunately.
    And yes, unconditional love thy name is woman.

    @ normal.is.overrated, :P

    @ Srinidhi, thanks!!:) Books are bearable I suppose.

    @ Mark, the thing is at the end of the day I AM a girl:) The point I was trying to make is that women don't need to crib about men ALL the time for they make mistakes as well.

    @ Chintan, :D

    @ Prateek, thank you:D

    @ nikhimenon, glad you liked:)

    @ BA, we could always become lesbos:P
    That's my whole point, we have to learn to co-exist without the need to bash up the opposite sex or rather men taking a hit all the time. Both sexes make mistakes.

    @ Chandana, the thing is the guys have been getting a greater dose around the blogger world in recent times, hence my post. Otherwise I don't believe in the bull either.

    Bingo, that's why I said 'respect us enough' to do the staring decently at the very least. Or something like that.

    @ Ovais, :)

    @ Divya, thangu:)
    Wow, those ARE points I should have added-_-
    And yes, one that I loved and wanted to write myself but then it would just be a repeat.

    @ Soumya, aaaaaand we can't live without them, can we?:D

    @ cricketfreak, true story, that:D

    @ Atrocious Scribblings, every single person regardless of what sex they are make mistakes and it's high time we put away this gender bull. Men need to start treating women as equals in the true sense of the word and women need to stop harassing men on their shortcomings.

    @ chitra, thanks:)
    Try in another browser, MF is kinda slow if that's what you are using.

    @ Hazel, :)

    @ KN. :D exactly my point milady!

    @ Aakriti, welcome to my space and glad you like it:)
    Thanks and nope, we never ever can:)

    ReplyDelete
  18. Check 2, 3 & 5 the rest hmm...I know women who hate shopping and men who are shopaholics. Also bitchy men who can give us a run for our money.

    We are all grey in our own unique ways :)

    ReplyDelete
  19. And I'm with Red Handed on one thing. I NEVER go with guys for shopping if I can help it. They just don't have the patience for it. I would rather go alone so that I can take my own sweet time and la-di-la away to glory. And bags... Well, I have carried heavy backpacks and handbags all my life. I'm sure I can handle the shopping bags too. :)

    ReplyDelete
  20. hahaha...nice points...its so nice of you to dwell into the details and admit it... otherwise we the boys usually take all the heat ... i think i should read it again and again and it may help me understand the females better :)

    ReplyDelete
  21. I recently wrote a short and sort of humourous post on women and their ways. So i completely agree with you.

    ReplyDelete
  22. @ Red Handed, :D
    But I wasn't generalising. Your post was fine and VALID but there were other posts that sprung up which were just inane rubbish about the 'oh-so-virtuous' girl and the 'villainous' boy. Hence mine.
    When you have valid complaints, you voice them. That's what you did.
    It just irked me that people jump on the band wagon JUST for the heck of it without a shred of solid stuff. You get it?
    :)

    @ Purba, grey, that's a good word to describe with:)

    @ Divya, point taken. Maybe I should start too:P

    @ Muhammad Israr, :D Thanks...

    @ jojofeelings, :)

    ReplyDelete
  23. "You exist because we do. You are happy because we make you happy."

    Guess what this reminded me of? :)

    ReplyDelete
  24. @ Sushmit, I have been wondering why YOU haven't commented on this yet...:P
    Let me guess, a home appliance ad?:D

    ReplyDelete

Go on, you can say it.