29 Feb 2016

Having An Epiphany on Quora


The world of Quora is very interesting. Though I am only a lurker, seeking answers and spying on lives from the shadows, I find it almost therapeutic reading people’s opinions/ answers on just about anything in the world.

I came across this thread (because for some reason, when asked, I added “Relationships and Love” as an area of expertise - you can stop laughing now, okay): what was the first thing people did/ felt after the person they loved broke up with them?

[I have to admit, I have little to no expertise in this particular domain; all my experience lies in being on the other side, unfortunately. I say unfortunately because people on this side can and will get over it…eventually. But those on the other side…. The guilt never really goes away]

Anyhoo. I digress.

What I got thinking was the things these real people did for other real people; they came apart at the seams when they were jilted. Should you even love a person so hard that you lose yourself? Maybe, you do, but just a little bit. Okay. But loving someone so much that you start entertaining thoughts of killing yourself when they leave your side?

Is that even real love? Doesn’t it sound more like an obsession you develop for something you are fond of? Or maybe a helpless form of dependence? Can you really, honestly say that you are in love with someone when all you can think about is how you can bring them back to your side and how you can keep them there? Isn't the need to possess more powerful than the deep affection you are supposed to be feeling?

I might be surprised to find out that most love in this world might be less love and more obsession/ unhealthily knotted co-dependence. Or maybe I won’t be surprised at all.


P.S: Have I said the word “love” enough number of times in this post? :P