Oh Lord, give me the serenity to accept that sometimes there might be another side to the story;
Give me courage to understand that some people are just morons;
And give me wisdom to understand the difference between the two kinds.
I have come to that inevitable point in life when my newsfeed is filled with wedding pictures and even baby pictures, in some cases. My best friend from school tells me that, come February 2015, I’ll be the only single friend she knows and I’m filled with a desire to pump a fist in the air for this achievement of sorts (I do realize that it is not a competition :P). Another friend tells me that I'll be maasi in exactly 8 months. I feel like I'm suspended in a place where all these are alien concepts, so to speak.
The reason for my version of the Serenity Prayer is something else though.
I notice a trend:
1) Find boyfriend.
2) Make boyfriend’s life hell with tantrums, post sap on Facebook.
3) Break up with him three dozen times and get back together with him three dozen times. Restart cycle.
4) One fine morning, realize that boyfriend is not good enough for you (this will coincide with the time that you complete your post-graduation - at least with people I know)
5) Get married to an NRI from US/UK/Ireland/Australia/Timbuktoo within the next six months. Or less.
My issue is not with the ditching of the boyfriend – I realize that some people are not cut out for braving a "tough" life (with a boyfriend who might not be settled in life) and are happy taking the easier way out. I also understand that you dated because the age you were at called for it and you didn’t think of the amount of money the boyfriend will have in his pocket by the time you are ready to get married when you were drunk on love. As long as the marriage is happy, I could care less.
My problem is the grieving period, so to speak, after the relationship. Most of these girls are married less than six months after I hear about their breakup and I wonder. I wonder how the fuck they are able to dispense off with the person they fell in love with and promised forever to so quickly and install someone new in their place, someone with big pockets who will gift you MAC makeup and Victoria's Secrets coupons, someone you hardly know.
I know I might be sitting on a high horse and passing unnecessary judgment where it is not required and sometimes it might not even valid, but I find it very unfair to the institutions of both marriage and love that you don’t even pretend to take time to get over someone you said ‘I love you’ to with your whole heart.
Or maybe none of it was real.
Which makes me so naïve and silly that it is not even funny anymore.
Give me courage to understand that some people are just morons;
And give me wisdom to understand the difference between the two kinds.
I have come to that inevitable point in life when my newsfeed is filled with wedding pictures and even baby pictures, in some cases. My best friend from school tells me that, come February 2015, I’ll be the only single friend she knows and I’m filled with a desire to pump a fist in the air for this achievement of sorts (I do realize that it is not a competition :P). Another friend tells me that I'll be maasi in exactly 8 months. I feel like I'm suspended in a place where all these are alien concepts, so to speak.
The reason for my version of the Serenity Prayer is something else though.
I notice a trend:
1) Find boyfriend.
2) Make boyfriend’s life hell with tantrums, post sap on Facebook.
3) Break up with him three dozen times and get back together with him three dozen times. Restart cycle.
4) One fine morning, realize that boyfriend is not good enough for you (this will coincide with the time that you complete your post-graduation - at least with people I know)
5) Get married to an NRI from US/UK/Ireland/Australia/Timbuktoo within the next six months. Or less.
My issue is not with the ditching of the boyfriend – I realize that some people are not cut out for braving a "tough" life (with a boyfriend who might not be settled in life) and are happy taking the easier way out. I also understand that you dated because the age you were at called for it and you didn’t think of the amount of money the boyfriend will have in his pocket by the time you are ready to get married when you were drunk on love. As long as the marriage is happy, I could care less.
My problem is the grieving period, so to speak, after the relationship. Most of these girls are married less than six months after I hear about their breakup and I wonder. I wonder how the fuck they are able to dispense off with the person they fell in love with and promised forever to so quickly and install someone new in their place, someone with big pockets who will gift you MAC makeup and Victoria's Secrets coupons, someone you hardly know.
I know I might be sitting on a high horse and passing unnecessary judgment where it is not required and sometimes it might not even valid, but I find it very unfair to the institutions of both marriage and love that you don’t even pretend to take time to get over someone you said ‘I love you’ to with your whole heart.
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| PC |
Which makes me so naïve and silly that it is not even funny anymore.
Right ?
ReplyDeleteI have the same exact question. How can they dust off, adjust their attire and keep complete faith in a perfect stranger who happens to have a bif pocket and is also working in some foreign country.
So when is your marriage? Hope I'm invited. :P. Too forward-thinking ? Well someone had to think right ? That better be me. :P
I'm hoping it is not all of them.
DeleteMy wedding will be when it will be. And yes, you are invited :P
its true with most of girls/women.they pose questions like caste problem,parents are angry with relationship,they analyse your financial status in the end.after going out with two girls and having shared whole-hearted emotions,i have turned into james bond coz there are no values or morally right behavior in relationships..if they want to freak for fun,they can and am not going to get emotional and they can leave any hour.life is easy and free now with emotionless relationships.
ReplyDeleteIt doesn't have to be this extreme or that...
DeleteIt is all about finding the right person at the right time.
I see the same thing going on and have the exact same thoughts you are talking about. I mean, there are people who go on rebound and then there are people who take things a step(s) far with marriage. It's sad. Really sad.
ReplyDeleteVery... So disillusioning :/
DeleteTrue to the word, PeeVee. I have seen one too many of such cases and they leave me wondering were they in love at all? How could they just step into the next phase so soon and so easily? Sigh! The pic you have put up is the perfect depiction of what is happening.
ReplyDeleteThanks, K.. So many many people, that too..
DeleteIt takes all kinds and to each his own. Who are we to disagree?
ReplyDeleteReminds me of: I travelled the world and the seven seas, everybody's lookin for somethin...
some of them want to use you...some of them want to be used by you...
Everybody IS looking for something but I don't agree with dividing the entire world into just the users and the used.
DeleteI have been through and seen several friends who were ditched by boyfriends... They were just not ready for marriage... They still wait... What do you say about that? Isn't waiting bad too?
ReplyDeleteThat is a whole other dimension of the problem. People being ditched by people they place trust in.
DeleteBut my concern is with the number of people who deal with love and relationships very flippantly.