I was terrified of change. Till I grew up and embraced change with both arms and legs. For change alone can alleviate the boredom that my controlled life frequently descends into. Are you laughing yet at the oxymoron? But that IS what I am, I have realized. I love adventure, but I hate unpredictability. I love shifts in pace but hate chaos. I love … well, this is not about how I am bundle of contradictions, is it?
No, it is not.
What I want to know is, will you change?
Will you change from being complacent to indifferent? Because the line is quite thin, I observe. Not wanting to change the light bulb now will earn you a dressing down now but will years of dressing downs diminish their ability to send you scrambling? I suspect it will.
Will you change from laughing at my unwillingness to share food to being judgmental about my inability to offer my bar of chocolate to my child? Being a mother is all about being selfless, right? Maybe. But I don’t think I am capable of being selfless and hence, taking upon that mantle is not something I am considering. Will you resent me for that? Rather, when will you resent me for it?
Will you change from being a planner to being happy-go-lucky? I see financial ruin in our futures because you know my purse strings are always gone with the wind. Impulse buying a sofa set can only be good when you have planned on where sustenance is coming from in the last few days of the month. But we will always need new shoes.
Will you change from tolerating my obsessive need to try new things to being my convive? You might just end up liking the casserole that your fried chicken megaburger. You might also appreciate why I find Indian cuisine the least appealing to cook, which is most unfortunate for right now but will you change and learn to appreciate how simple yet tasty pasta can be.
Will you change?
I hope you do.
Growth is always a good thing, right?
I hope you don’t.
I don’t want change to be the only constant I can count on.
You know what? Fuck it.
If you know how this is going to turn out, what's the fun?
No, it is not.
What I want to know is, will you change?
Will you change from being complacent to indifferent? Because the line is quite thin, I observe. Not wanting to change the light bulb now will earn you a dressing down now but will years of dressing downs diminish their ability to send you scrambling? I suspect it will.
Will you change from laughing at my unwillingness to share food to being judgmental about my inability to offer my bar of chocolate to my child? Being a mother is all about being selfless, right? Maybe. But I don’t think I am capable of being selfless and hence, taking upon that mantle is not something I am considering. Will you resent me for that? Rather, when will you resent me for it?
Will you change from being a planner to being happy-go-lucky? I see financial ruin in our futures because you know my purse strings are always gone with the wind. Impulse buying a sofa set can only be good when you have planned on where sustenance is coming from in the last few days of the month. But we will always need new shoes.
Will you change from tolerating my obsessive need to try new things to being my convive? You might just end up liking the casserole that your fried chicken megaburger. You might also appreciate why I find Indian cuisine the least appealing to cook, which is most unfortunate for right now but will you change and learn to appreciate how simple yet tasty pasta can be.
Will you change?
I hope you do.
Growth is always a good thing, right?
I hope you don’t.
I don’t want change to be the only constant I can count on.
You know what? Fuck it.
If you know how this is going to turn out, what's the fun?
Change or not to change..
ReplyDeleteAnd to think I come across this post right when I've been asking myself similar questions.
ReplyDeleteYour posts make my day, milady! :)
Loved it!
ReplyDeleteHumans are highly adaptable creatures, so yes, change is good but not when it happens too often.
You weave magic with your words. I have read all your posts but first time commenting.
Harita
Hahha..!! I totally.. as in totally enjoyed reading this one!!!
ReplyDeleteCheers